My Problem With Feminism

feminism

I have a super-strict policy against hating anybody. So if I ever get the temptation to display or even think negative emotions toward a person or group of people, I can usually choke it down. Usually.

There is one cultural group that can slip past that shield of love and gentleness. Feminists. I get really frustrated with feminists.

Is it because I’m a chauvinist who considers males inherently superior to females? No, and don’t ever call me that because if you do I may get really depressed. I am an ardent believer in the circular phrase (also epic Depeche Mode song title) “people are people.” That means that every human being deserves the same treatment. A treatment of respect and dignity, no less.

Here’s my problems with most feminists. The ones I meet consider themselves to be superior to men. Of course I’ve never met them all so I’m technically stereotyping here. They have an attitude more based on royalty than equality. It seems that in these people’s mind a contradiction occurs. They require the following conditions. 

Condition 1: I expect to be treated equally to men.
Condition 2: I expect the same chivalry I’m used to.

These conditions I feel are mutually exclusive. 

Lets say I try to open the door for a woman, something I’ve been taught all my life to do for women. I’m not flirting with her, just being nice. A feminist like this would get mad if I open the door for her. She would think I was trying to take her independence. Okay, I could see that. 

So let’s say I just open the door and went in, leaving the door inevitably slammed in her face. Okay, now I’m mistreating her. You can’t have it both ways.

So that leaves the only option remaining. I could see her, step aside, and let her go first. That is an example of societal female dominance. It’s also probably a little cowardly on my part. I guess I just can’t win.

Then also the other kind of feminist. The one who thinks that men owe women for the hundreds of years of historical oppression they had to endure. This type of thinking I absolutely reject, and call complete bull crap. 

Yes, women were mistreated historically. And I’m sorry if shades of that mistreatment still exist as shadows from the past. But I’m not the one doing the mistreating. I don’t owe a feminist anything except the common respect I give to every human that lives on the planet. Dominating men will not justify the actions in the past that feminists are not even directly affected by. 

Finally, and I’m talking directly to all women here, I know that there are some seriously messed up and perverted men in the world. These “pigs” will objectify you and whistle at you on the street. They desire sex and perversion above all else. They will make you feel uncomfortable, and rightly so. They make me sick. These type of men are not who I want representing my gender. These are the exceptions to the rule of men trying just as hard as women to advance society. 

With these men, please, I wholeheartedly encourage you to consider yourself better than them. Because you are. If feminism should exist, it should be an offensive weapon against the perverted men of the world. Nothing more. 

Let’s all look past gender. Let’s all just be human.

[Thanks Tiea Martin for suggesting this topic!]

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Matthew Estes

Matthew Estes currently exists in the ether between graudate student and full-time worker. One day he hopes to be a full-time novelist and blogger, but until that day comes he spends his time playing video games, eating pizza, and being with his soon-to-be wife. However, he has yet to do all three at the same time. Bucket list stuff, you know.